What a kerfuffle

After all the fuss and bother following the Exposure programme which showed undercover filming in a funeral home on TV a few weeks ago, things have returned to normal.  Obviously my avid reader, you don't need me to tell you that we aren't all like that and never have I experienced anything like the programme showed.   You know me by now, I'm not the kind of person who would tolerate it, let alone participate.  But, be reassured, never in all my days have I seen such lack of respect. 

Moving on, the last few weeks have been relatively quiet on the embalming front for me.  I have a feeling its the calm before the storm as the weather is changing and winter will soon be upon us.   I have been working hard though and having a look at some different embalming fluids which are available to me.  Its a bit like changing washing up liquid.   You know it all does the same thing, but some liquids do their job better than others so you keep trying all the new ones to see how they work and if they can make an improvement on what you are already using.    Its interesting for me to keep abreast of any developments within my field.

I had a person come to me a few weeks ago covered in faecal matter and vomit.  For me, it needs to be removed as soon as possible after they arrive.  Escaping body fluids have the nasty habit of assisting decomposition and skin slip.    A thorough bath down soon remedies this and everyone is relieved as odours travel quickly throughout the buildings.    

We also have had some clients who have no family this month and although they are having a cremation provided by the state, they are embalmed, gowned and presented in the same way as everyone else.  I am proud of this, because the companies I work for value everyone we serve. 

Nothing much else to say just now, I really must consider something interesting to talk about.  Anyone want to know something I haven't covered?   Let me know. 

What do you call a collective of Embalmers?

I have no idea.   But after spending this weekend with 100 of them, I would say something like ' A bloody great bunch'.

This weekend was our biennial gathering of fellows, members and students of the British Institute of Embalmers for a day and a half of lectures and general socialising.   Having members from all over the world means we are lucky enough to attract some excellent speakers who work within embalming or research into embalming and anatomy.   We had sessions which showed slides and video work of some of the most skilled reconstruction embalming I have ever seen.  I can only dream of being able to help a family view their loved one who committed suicide by placing their head under a compacting whacker plate.   Another fascinating lecture demonstrated how connected our vascular system is using the assistance of phosphorescence.   It truly is a beautiful thing to watch a body glow.  Imagine donating your body to medical science and then watch it from your 'heaven' being lit up in full glory!

Another interesting talk demonstrated an alternative method of embalming babies.   This lecture was backed up with a full hand-out of which I am always grateful.  I am so appreciative of my colleagues sharing their knowledge with me,  as I know others are.   It really is a special gift to be able to innovate, push boundaries and share willingly.

The evenings are spent having dinner and chatting with friends old and new.    Being part hippy, I really appreciate the freedom of being able to walk up to anyone and introduce myself and ask them about themselves.  Some take to it well, others find it awkward but after a couple of drinks loosen up!  Also, I must stop kissing people!   I do it only by way of greeting previous attendees you understand, but a couple of people recoiled as I thrust myself upon them.   Poor devils!

When I arrived at work today, I was faced with a pre-term baby and two post mortem cases, one of which was a young lady.  One is always keen as mustard after Keele; having been inspired, educated and comparing stories for two days.     I changed into my scrubs and set to work willing to apply any new techniques I had picked up.    I changed around a couple of my working methods today and spent a little longer looking at the vessels in the PM.

I am quickened once more.

Do not speak of me in that tone of voice.

To say that I was furious about the Dispatches 'Undercover Undertaker' programme last night is an overstatement. 

I was very excited to see what scandalous operations were secretly filmed and hopeful of them ensuring regulatory changes were to be made in the funeral industry.   It was all a bit of a let down to be honest.  

The programme showed secret filming of a warehouse which housed a mortuary racking system - where deceased were kept prior to being embalmed, coffined, and returned to the local funeral home and where the fleet of vehicles were kept along with a large supply of coffins.   The programme also showed a funeral home manager training his team to not promote the cheaper coffins and not to offer the cheapest funerals.   The 'investigator' also discussed the need for 'hygienic treatment' and its' cost and whether this was a necessity to the client.  They showed through secret filming, how the funeral arranger advised families they needed this treatment as there were to be viewings of the deceased and asked them to sign for permission to carry out this treatment.

I believe your chosen funeral home should house the deceased they are looking after, where possible, for the whole duration of their stay before the funeral.    Your funeral director should not be trying to persuade you into purchasing something you do not need, and that includes a more expensive coffin.  Within every industry there are unscrupulous individuals who are out for every ounce of profit they can make.   Funeral homes need to make a profit to stay in business but whilst doing so they can be clear and honest with their clients, conduct themselves in a manner befitting the trust placed in their laps.

I was very disappointed with the funeral spokesperson as he didn't explain the reasons for hygienic treatment.

He could have said that we try to ensure the best possible experience when saying goodbye and hygienic treatment helps with that.  It also means the persons who need to dress the deceased can do so knowing they aren't going to be covered in faeces, vomit, blood or other body fluids because their embalmer has been in and cleaned everything and disinfected everything and made the deceased look at peace.  He could have asked the reporter if she had seen a deceased person who had been poorly and unable to shave or wash their hair or clean their nails.  Then made her return once they had been embalmed and had their dignity restored for their loved ones last image of them.   Goodness!  Can you tell I am very irritated?   What a complete let down. 

I have no way of letting the public know how I feel.  So here I am letting you all know so you can tell anyone who mentions it to you.   If you have any questions or comments, I would be happy to answer them to the best of my ability here for you.  I feel sorry for the people who have used the funeral home mentioned in the documentary, they possibly feel very let down.   I hope they don't.  Just because there are a few idiot individuals,  the whole company isn't full of them.

Next time I shall try to not rant!   Meanwhile, my colleague has a good blog for you to look at too.  

Great expectations

Hello everyone, its been a month since I last posted, sorry.   Sometimes I feel I have covered everything here, then every day something new happens and I want to share it with you.   I find myself needing to wait though, to ensure the anonymity of the people I look after.

Do take a moment to watch the film I posted by Briony Campbell.  It is very moving, and in the spirit of Death Cafe , very relevant.  People talking about death is a good thing.  Hard.  But good.

I was horrified when a family member asked to meet me a couple of weeks ago.   It's not something I do very often as I am more of a 'back room staff' kind of girl.  I have no formal training on meeting the families and I am never, ever dressed appropriately for it.   

I telephoned and spoke to him and apologised for my jeans and t-shirt but would be happy to see them in an hour.    He was so sad at the death of his father and wanted to go over a few things that he didn't want for him.  One of those was embalming.

The funeral director had already explained that as various other family members wanted to see Dad, we encourage embalming.  I expanded on this explaining that we want everyone to have the best experience they can, and embalming would ensure this for them.  We both agreed that Dad needed to look peaceful and natural.   We discussed hair washing, shaving, bathing and cleaning nails and the son explained that he had previously had a couple of experiences with chapel visits and they weren't good. ( Not with my company I hasten to add!  )

He didn't want Dad to have swollen features, nor his teeth replaced as he never wore his dentures.   Rather interestingly, Dad wasn't to be dressed in pyjamas, clothes or a gown either.  Just a plain sheet.  Wrapped like a towel out of the bath.    Also, his hands weren't to touch as he had gripped them during his illness, whenever he was in pain.   

We always want to help the families with their requests.  No matter how different they are.   I completely understood his feelings and everyone did their best to ensure every detail was perfect. 

My embalming treatment was a subtle one.  It felt odd not using any colourant, and not replacing teeth, but I managed to get a peaceful look none the less.    Wrapping him in a clean white sheet and placing him in his coffin was easy enough, and the effect was actually quite clinical.  Medical, healing even. Peaceful too.

Viewings occurred later that week, and from what I have been told, everyone was pleased to see him to say their goodbyes.   The immediate family didn't come in, but I hope his son took comfort from knowing we carried out all his wishes, to the letter.  

Death Cafe: The Dad Project

Death Cafe: The Dad Project

A beautiful film made by a brave family.

Just having a peek around the internet

These sites have come into my eye line.    I haven't checked them out completely but thought I would share them with you...

http://morbiddesires.tumblr.com/

http://funeralsauce.tumblr.com/

http://dearlydeparted-.tumblr.com/


Don't leave me...  just have a little extra.  :D

Anyone can do the easy ones.

Pulling back the sheet covering a gentleman I was asked to attend this week,  I let out a huge sigh. 

Purple.  Red.  Swollen. Enough considerations to stimulate the most sleepy of minds, I realised a challenge was before me.   In situations such as these I remember my colleague telling me 'Anyone can do the easy ones'.

I was informed that this man was being viewed the following day, but luckily his funeral was in three days so he didn't have to stay with us too much longer.  The paramount consideration was therefore viewing, ensuring that he looked at peace for his family.   But where to start?

Mr Man had been found after a couple of days of being dead in bed.  It seemed he had died in his sleep but as he lived alone, he wasn't discovered immediately.   The post mortem had been carried out and a natural cause of death established.   I set to work opening the sutures and concentrating on washing him and locating the vessels required for treatment.   Mixing my fluids I chose a usual strength as he was leaving us quite quickly, and the addition of a fluid which is designed to help resist further decomposition.   We can't turn the clock back but we can press pause.   For a short time at least.

After thorough embalming and washing and drying his hair, I dried his face and started to think about what work I could do to cover the discolouration.   Fortunately there was no facial skin slip, where the start of decomposition separates the top layer of the skin and blisters (a little like sunburn).    Some embalmers have access to an air spray cosmetic system.  I have had the opportunity to have a go, and look forward to developing techniques in the future, but for now I use various creams and liquid cosmetics.   I use my gloved hand to mix and develop the colour I need and slowly covered Mr Mans entire face with the chosen blend.

This isn't done with one layer, its a multi layered slow process, changing the palette as I go, adding softer warmer colours in the facial 'hot spots' to create a natural and even skin tone.   This is very hard to do in cases of skin slip because the base isn't there to start with.  Even more impossible immediately following embalming and better to be done when the fluid has had time to fix the tissues.    Eyebrows, lashes and hair lines are cleaned and traces of the cosmetic removed.  This is easier said than done!

Eventually, a tint to the lips completes the overall look and one needs to be satisfied that the deceased doesn't look as if they are wearing make up, or indeed that anything other than their natural self is presented.   Dressing can be a bit of a hassle after cosmetic work, and sometimes it is better that the deceased is dressed  and placed into their coffin prior to cosmetic work being carried out.   I helped place Mr Man into his coffin and when he was placed into the Chapel of Rest with appropriate lighting, I was more than confident that traces of his previous colouring were removed.  He looked at rest and the same as anyone else who resides in our Chapels. 

The family communicated their satisfaction and no one has to know that Mr Man was anything other than how he presented that day.   His last face to them was one of peace and rest.

Ally Sheedys character in Chris Columbus 1991 film Only the Lonely, cosmetises her clients to resemble famous movie stars!