Everyone is different, aint that the truth!

When someone has been curled up in bed for a long time and they die, they are often 'set' in that position; usually foetal.   This makes me re-think my usual choice of artery, the axillary within the axilla (armpit).   This means I need to choose another starting point for injecting the formaldehyde and usually I move a little way along the axillary artery to the shoulder.  This method is commonly called 'bra strap incision'.     

Bra strap incision is a neat little incision, easily hidden under clothes and if necessary easily cosmetised for strapless gowns.   Once the initial incision has been made, the vessels can be easily located between nerves and tendons and the injection and drainage process is exactly the same.   The axillary artery is just picked up at its topmost end. 

My colleague and I are fortunate to have a student embalmer training with us for one day a week.  This week was his first week and as he has already completed the theoretical training of his British Institute of Embalmers Diploma he is keen to get his practical examinations too.

He has had a little practical experience already so I asked him to choose his vessel to raise and he chose the right common carotid artery.    He showed me where he was to make his incision and as it was correct I instructed him to proceed.    A neat opening was created and he set to work dissecting tissue and raising the artery. 

Imagine my surprise when he pulled up the artery and it had three other small arteries running off it.  This was not the common carotid artery but most likely the subclavian artery which should have been more to the right of the clavicle.   We attempted to inject the formaldehyde solution but it wasn't working as well as we hoped so I ligated it off and sought the common carotid.  There it was!  Just a little more medial than expected.  The injection and drainage process was completed and the deceased looked super.  No different for the experience.

Trust a student to keep my brain active and keep me on my toes!

Photos with thanks from Anatomist 90 via Wiki

Seasonal blues

I haven't suffered with post Christmas blues since I had my child ten years ago.  You know that feeling of having overspent at Christmas, parties all finished, gifts demolished and pounds piled on?  Truly a melancholy.  But, being born in early January has made it an exciting time for us as a family and something we look forward to.   

This year, Christmas and birthday time was a little sadder following the loss of my mother in law.  We got through it though, and thought of her often.

Many dear friends have already watched their parents, or worse; child, die.  I have lately thought whether I offered enough support to them now having been on the receiving end of such sadness.  I certainly am determined to make sure I am as supportive as I can be in the future.

Having such a personal loss has made me a little more thoughtful for the deceased I look after and their families.   I have been very busy this last week and so have my colleagues.  Each embalming we do usually is connected with someones utter devastation at their loss.     I say 'usually' because there are some who leave behind very few who care about them.  Each year we carry out many funerals for people who have no family or friends resulting in no one at their cremation other than the funeral director, bearers and possibly a nurse from a home.    

On the other side, some funerals have so many people attending that they overflow the crematorium or cemetery. 

It makes no difference to my work either way.

A personal touch

Embalming your own family is both a privilege and an honour.   It is also a source of a great deal of worry and postponement of your own grieving.

My wonderful mother in law died and as we had always talked about how I would look after her, I felt the weight of obligation and duty heavy on my shoulders.   I need not have worried though, she made it easy for me.

Initially I was concerned about whether I would be able to take on the task as its obviously not something you do every day.  I have embalmed friends and their relatives, and relatives relatives but never someone who meant so much to me.

I messaged my colleagues on our secret facebook group, posting asking for their thoughts and advice and I was overwhelmed by their kind words and consideration for me.  Most of them had embalmed family, some had not but felt it was something they could do.  All of them agreed that it would be hard but something that I was 'bound' to do. To quote my colleague 'A'  - I have looked after all my rellies and many friends, I tend to chat all the way through and cry too, tho usually cry at end when everything is done and they're in chapel. Be yourself and do what you do, just for her... Be proud you can look after her as the last care giver and with love and thanks for the part she played in your life.   and  'M'  -  To embalm one of our own family is, in my humble opinion, the final and most precious act of love.     Several of these people messaged me offering to come help, and also messaged me during the day to check I was feeling OK. 

My own family and that of my dear mother in law, didn't talk to me about it much, full to overflowing with their own grief at their sudden loss,  I didn't really expect anything different.  Lets face it, its not something you want to talk about if you are not in the business.   But my parents, sister and my loyal and trusted friends couldn't have been kinder and more considerate to me.  Some in grand gestures and others in their quiet, supportive way.  But I knew I was being propped up in all directions so I couldn't fail.

The day I went to embalm her was four days after death.  Sadly, papers weren't completed in enough time to bring her to premises before the weekend, but Monday morning first thing, my colleagues collected her for me and I attended as soon as I could get there.    My stomach churned, dreading how I would react, just hoping that I would have my 'medical head' kick in and my emotions would be turned off for just that short time.


Entering the theatre, I felt such a dread in the pit of my stomach, nothing had ever felt like this before.  I have lost lots of loved ones, but none have made me have physical pain; such heartache.  True ache in my heart.

So, there she was, in that place where so many have been before.

I need not have felt any dread.   She did for me as she had done all her days.  She helped me.  She would never have made things awkward for me, uncomfortable for me, difficult for me.  Neither did she in death.

I pulled away the sheet covering her small frame.  She looked so peaceful.  Not a line on her countenance, not a hair out of place.  No hypostasis, no oedema, no purging, nothing to create a distressing scene.  A couple of IV sites and a removed pacemaker suture were the only signs of medical, physical trauma.  I took a deep breath and started to work.

When everything was done, I washed her hair, dried and tonged it.  Dressed her in her lovely pink jumper and black trousers and replaced her glasses.   She looked lovely.  What a relief, I cant tell you.  My colleague helped me gently pop her into her coffin, dressed lovingly in a pink frill and we wheeled her into chapel.    I set the lighting and told her I would be back later with her children.

Then I cried.

What a kerfuffle

After all the fuss and bother following the Exposure programme which showed undercover filming in a funeral home on TV a few weeks ago, things have returned to normal.  Obviously my avid reader, you don't need me to tell you that we aren't all like that and never have I experienced anything like the programme showed.   You know me by now, I'm not the kind of person who would tolerate it, let alone participate.  But, be reassured, never in all my days have I seen such lack of respect. 

Moving on, the last few weeks have been relatively quiet on the embalming front for me.  I have a feeling its the calm before the storm as the weather is changing and winter will soon be upon us.   I have been working hard though and having a look at some different embalming fluids which are available to me.  Its a bit like changing washing up liquid.   You know it all does the same thing, but some liquids do their job better than others so you keep trying all the new ones to see how they work and if they can make an improvement on what you are already using.    Its interesting for me to keep abreast of any developments within my field.

I had a person come to me a few weeks ago covered in faecal matter and vomit.  For me, it needs to be removed as soon as possible after they arrive.  Escaping body fluids have the nasty habit of assisting decomposition and skin slip.    A thorough bath down soon remedies this and everyone is relieved as odours travel quickly throughout the buildings.    

We also have had some clients who have no family this month and although they are having a cremation provided by the state, they are embalmed, gowned and presented in the same way as everyone else.  I am proud of this, because the companies I work for value everyone we serve. 

Nothing much else to say just now, I really must consider something interesting to talk about.  Anyone want to know something I haven't covered?   Let me know. 

What do you call a collective of Embalmers?

I have no idea.   But after spending this weekend with 100 of them, I would say something like ' A bloody great bunch'.

This weekend was our biennial gathering of fellows, members and students of the British Institute of Embalmers for a day and a half of lectures and general socialising.   Having members from all over the world means we are lucky enough to attract some excellent speakers who work within embalming or research into embalming and anatomy.   We had sessions which showed slides and video work of some of the most skilled reconstruction embalming I have ever seen.  I can only dream of being able to help a family view their loved one who committed suicide by placing their head under a compacting whacker plate.   Another fascinating lecture demonstrated how connected our vascular system is using the assistance of phosphorescence.   It truly is a beautiful thing to watch a body glow.  Imagine donating your body to medical science and then watch it from your 'heaven' being lit up in full glory!

Another interesting talk demonstrated an alternative method of embalming babies.   This lecture was backed up with a full hand-out of which I am always grateful.  I am so appreciative of my colleagues sharing their knowledge with me,  as I know others are.   It really is a special gift to be able to innovate, push boundaries and share willingly.

The evenings are spent having dinner and chatting with friends old and new.    Being part hippy, I really appreciate the freedom of being able to walk up to anyone and introduce myself and ask them about themselves.  Some take to it well, others find it awkward but after a couple of drinks loosen up!  Also, I must stop kissing people!   I do it only by way of greeting previous attendees you understand, but a couple of people recoiled as I thrust myself upon them.   Poor devils!

When I arrived at work today, I was faced with a pre-term baby and two post mortem cases, one of which was a young lady.  One is always keen as mustard after Keele; having been inspired, educated and comparing stories for two days.     I changed into my scrubs and set to work willing to apply any new techniques I had picked up.    I changed around a couple of my working methods today and spent a little longer looking at the vessels in the PM.

I am quickened once more.

Do not speak of me in that tone of voice.

To say that I was furious about the Dispatches 'Undercover Undertaker' programme last night is an overstatement. 

I was very excited to see what scandalous operations were secretly filmed and hopeful of them ensuring regulatory changes were to be made in the funeral industry.   It was all a bit of a let down to be honest.  

The programme showed secret filming of a warehouse which housed a mortuary racking system - where deceased were kept prior to being embalmed, coffined, and returned to the local funeral home and where the fleet of vehicles were kept along with a large supply of coffins.   The programme also showed a funeral home manager training his team to not promote the cheaper coffins and not to offer the cheapest funerals.   The 'investigator' also discussed the need for 'hygienic treatment' and its' cost and whether this was a necessity to the client.  They showed through secret filming, how the funeral arranger advised families they needed this treatment as there were to be viewings of the deceased and asked them to sign for permission to carry out this treatment.

I believe your chosen funeral home should house the deceased they are looking after, where possible, for the whole duration of their stay before the funeral.    Your funeral director should not be trying to persuade you into purchasing something you do not need, and that includes a more expensive coffin.  Within every industry there are unscrupulous individuals who are out for every ounce of profit they can make.   Funeral homes need to make a profit to stay in business but whilst doing so they can be clear and honest with their clients, conduct themselves in a manner befitting the trust placed in their laps.

I was very disappointed with the funeral spokesperson as he didn't explain the reasons for hygienic treatment.

He could have said that we try to ensure the best possible experience when saying goodbye and hygienic treatment helps with that.  It also means the persons who need to dress the deceased can do so knowing they aren't going to be covered in faeces, vomit, blood or other body fluids because their embalmer has been in and cleaned everything and disinfected everything and made the deceased look at peace.  He could have asked the reporter if she had seen a deceased person who had been poorly and unable to shave or wash their hair or clean their nails.  Then made her return once they had been embalmed and had their dignity restored for their loved ones last image of them.   Goodness!  Can you tell I am very irritated?   What a complete let down. 

I have no way of letting the public know how I feel.  So here I am letting you all know so you can tell anyone who mentions it to you.   If you have any questions or comments, I would be happy to answer them to the best of my ability here for you.  I feel sorry for the people who have used the funeral home mentioned in the documentary, they possibly feel very let down.   I hope they don't.  Just because there are a few idiot individuals,  the whole company isn't full of them.

Next time I shall try to not rant!   Meanwhile, my colleague has a good blog for you to look at too.  

Great expectations

Hello everyone, its been a month since I last posted, sorry.   Sometimes I feel I have covered everything here, then every day something new happens and I want to share it with you.   I find myself needing to wait though, to ensure the anonymity of the people I look after.

Do take a moment to watch the film I posted by Briony Campbell.  It is very moving, and in the spirit of Death Cafe , very relevant.  People talking about death is a good thing.  Hard.  But good.

I was horrified when a family member asked to meet me a couple of weeks ago.   It's not something I do very often as I am more of a 'back room staff' kind of girl.  I have no formal training on meeting the families and I am never, ever dressed appropriately for it.   

I telephoned and spoke to him and apologised for my jeans and t-shirt but would be happy to see them in an hour.    He was so sad at the death of his father and wanted to go over a few things that he didn't want for him.  One of those was embalming.

The funeral director had already explained that as various other family members wanted to see Dad, we encourage embalming.  I expanded on this explaining that we want everyone to have the best experience they can, and embalming would ensure this for them.  We both agreed that Dad needed to look peaceful and natural.   We discussed hair washing, shaving, bathing and cleaning nails and the son explained that he had previously had a couple of experiences with chapel visits and they weren't good. ( Not with my company I hasten to add!  )

He didn't want Dad to have swollen features, nor his teeth replaced as he never wore his dentures.   Rather interestingly, Dad wasn't to be dressed in pyjamas, clothes or a gown either.  Just a plain sheet.  Wrapped like a towel out of the bath.    Also, his hands weren't to touch as he had gripped them during his illness, whenever he was in pain.   

We always want to help the families with their requests.  No matter how different they are.   I completely understood his feelings and everyone did their best to ensure every detail was perfect. 

My embalming treatment was a subtle one.  It felt odd not using any colourant, and not replacing teeth, but I managed to get a peaceful look none the less.    Wrapping him in a clean white sheet and placing him in his coffin was easy enough, and the effect was actually quite clinical.  Medical, healing even. Peaceful too.

Viewings occurred later that week, and from what I have been told, everyone was pleased to see him to say their goodbyes.   The immediate family didn't come in, but I hope his son took comfort from knowing we carried out all his wishes, to the letter.